June 6, 2025
Fifty Shades of Therapy” – My Brush with the Bionic Arm

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So… I fell. Yep. Not the dramatic, slow-motion, Oscar-winning kind. Just a regular, not-so-graceful, "Oops-did-anyone-see-that" type of fall. Thankfully, it wasn’t serious—unless you count the bruised ego and the awkward shuffle into therapy afterward.

I showed up thinking I’d get the usual pep talk, a few stretches, maybe some ultrasound. But my therapist had other plans. He rolled in with a thing. Not just any thing—this metallic, spring-loaded contraption straight out of a science fiction movie... or an underground S&M catalog.

"Don’t worry," he said with a straight face. "It’s just a hand splint."

Right. Just a hand splint.

Let me describe this beauty: straps, springs, metal bars, adjustable knobs. Basically, it looked like someone raided the toolbox, threw in a towel for comfort, and decided, “Let’s rehab like it’s 2099!”

At first, I froze. Was this a joke? A medieval torture device? Was I about to confess secrets I didn’t even know I had?

But then something magical happened—we laughed. A lot.

There I was, lying back like a cyborg-in-training, fingers curled into position, while the therapist adjusted the contraption with the focus of a NASA engineer. It was absurd. It was brilliant. It was therapy with flair.

And surprisingly, it helped. I could feel the stretch, the engagement, the science behind the madness. It was working—just not without a little drama and a whole lot of humor.

So next time you see me, don’t be surprised if I casually mention my stint as a part-time Transformer. Just know that behind the metal, the knobs, and the laughter, healing is happening—one click at a time.

P.S. No safe words were required during this session… but maybe next time I’ll come prepared. 😜